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Old 08-07-2012, 03:03 PM   #176 (permalink)
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Are you sure you went down on the right hole? After all it was your first time and it sounds like your eyes were closed!
LOLOL. Oh this is just too funny. Maybe he should've used a snorkel for better vision and breathing?
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:10 PM   #177 (permalink)
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Oh lord...
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:13 PM   #178 (permalink)
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Oh lord...
Sorry that a lady had to read what has been written, but that kid needs an ed-ja-ma-kay-shun when it comes to females.

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Originally Posted by Nodie27 View Post
I re-read my post and it wasn't too clear but you translated my non sense correctly.

See when I started out, I was going off of movies that I saw and in those it was reciprocation on the "warm up" part of intercourse so I assumed that was just what you were supposed to do. Coincidentily, because of these movies I thought bad perms and mustaches were the norm, but that's neither here nor there. Now years later, women I've talked to about this say that a huge majority of guys don't extend the oral olive branch and I know that if they find a guy that does, it's a huge bonus.
So you are saying I grew that mustache for nothing. Who knew?

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Old 08-07-2012, 03:16 PM   #179 (permalink)
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Oh lord...
Oooosh, do you think Travis Snider is a giver? Or do you think he's selfish and finds it ickey?
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:17 PM   #180 (permalink)
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Oooosh, do you think Travis Snider is a giver? Or do you think he's selfish and finds it ickey?
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:30 PM   #181 (permalink)
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Are you sure you went down on the right hole? After all it was your first time and it sounds like your eyes were closed!
Can't stop LMAO. Thank You
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:49 PM   #182 (permalink)
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With his motorcycle cop 'stach???

What woman would resist?????

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Originally Posted by Nodie27 View Post
Oooosh, do you think Travis Snider is a giver? Or do you think he's selfish and finds it ickey?
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:50 PM   #183 (permalink)
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With his motorcycle cop 'stach???

What woman would resist?????
I bet he is just mackin it up on those Yinzer ladies in the 'Burgh. Hubba Hubba
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:51 PM   #184 (permalink)
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With his motorcycle cop 'stach???

What woman would resist?????
Seriously though, who can resist?
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:52 PM   #185 (permalink)
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I pity poor Mr. Snider...

Has to deal with Rothelisberger's sloppy fourths....

He should probably find a nice Canadian gal to settle down with...

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I bet he is just mackin it up on those Yinzer ladies in the 'Burgh. Hubba Hubba
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:55 PM   #186 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Ooosh View Post
Seriously though, who can resist?
Quote:
Originally Posted by BostonNut View Post
I pity poor Mr. Snider...

Has to deal with Rothelisberger's sloppy fourths....

He should probably find a nice Canadian gal to settle down with...
He does say that his mustache seats 1. I think we need to work on a love connection.
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Old 08-07-2012, 03:56 PM   #187 (permalink)
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Okay, I just spit out my coffee. At work. Thanks guys.
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:04 PM   #188 (permalink)
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I can understand why you would be overwhelmed going down on her for the first time. The vagina is very complex in compassion to the penis. We could also come to a lot of conclusions as to why you didn't like it. Smell, grooming issues, etc. Do not mention any of these to her, ever! Maybe you could start things out by suggesting you spice things up by showering together. If you want her to groom, offer to manscape for her. She may feel the need to touch up down below. If all that doesn't work, get a clothes pin, grin and bear it.

First of all, she is your girlfriend now so there is no way you are getting out of going down on her again so you might as well get really good at it and enjoy it. Don't be afraid to get your fingers in on the action but don't be overly aggressive. I have some tips but I am afraid this post is going to get me banned. Lets just say minimal entry and feel for a hidden treasure.

You mentioned she asked you to bite it. She doesn't want you to bite it like you would a french fry she wants you to nibble it, gently. More like, if you try to hold something tiny in between your teeth without breaking it. Imagine holding a cherry stem in between your front bottom and top teeth. If she wants more pressure, she will ask. Change the speed of your licking and gauge the pressure she likes. It will change. Get to know her body movements when she is enjoying herself. Most women have a tell sorta like when men lie during poker. She will squirm, take a deep inhale or exhale or moan. That is when you want to be paying the most attention and repeat as needed.

Also, before you start the next time have the lights on and just admire it. You should always look at your plate before you eat. If she asks what you are doing, say "admiring your beauty."

PS Look a diagram online and get to know the parts. Not knowing the parts is like trying to fix a car when you have never seen an engine.
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:05 PM   #189 (permalink)
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Okay, I just spit out my coffee. At work. Thanks guys.
Please add any tips. I think I am pretty spot on, right?
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:11 PM   #190 (permalink)
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Please add any tips. I think I am pretty spot on, right?
I think you just helped out a ton of people. Random women are going to have their men joined the forums for "Josie Dive Ly-ssons". I think we sould start a new section!
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:13 PM   #191 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by JosieDively View Post
I can understand why you would be overwhelmed going down on her for the first time. The vagina is very complex in compassion to the penis. We could also come to a lot of conclusions as to why you didn't like it. Smell, grooming issues, etc. Do not mention any of these to her, ever! Maybe you could start things out by suggesting you spice things up by showering together. If you want her to groom, offer to manscape for her. She may feel the need to touch up down below. If all that doesn't work, get a clothes pin, grin and bear it.

First of all, she is your girlfriend now so there is no way you are getting out of going down on her again so you might as well get really good at it and enjoy it. Don't be afraid to get your fingers in on the action but don't be overly aggressive. I have some tips but I am afraid this post is going to get me banned. Lets just say minimal entry and feel for a hidden treasure.

You mentioned she asked you to bite it. She doesn't want you to bite it like you would a french fry she wants you to nibble it, gently. More like, if you try to hold something tiny in between your teeth without breaking it. Imagine holding a cherry stem in between your front bottom and top teeth. If she wants more pressure, she will ask. Change the speed of your licking and gauge the pressure she likes. It will change. Get to know her body movements when she is enjoying herself. Most women have a tell sorta like when men lie during poker. She will squirm, take a deep inhale or exhale or moan. That is when you want to be paying the most attention and repeat as needed.

Also, before you start the next time have the lights on and just admire it. You should always look at your plate before you eat. If she asks what you are doing, say "admiring your beauty."

PS Look a diagram online and get to know the parts. Not knowing the parts is like trying to fix a car when you have never seen an engine.
Wow, this is quite thorough. Have you ever been a sex-ed teacher or are you just an "amateur" anatomy expert?
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:14 PM   #192 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by WilsonValdez View Post
Wow, this is quite thorough. Have you ever been a sex-ed teacher or are you just an "amateur" anatomy expert?
LOL

One does not have to be a sex-ed teacher to understand that stuff -- just have to view an appropriate amount of entertaining clips online.
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:19 PM   #193 (permalink)
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LOL

One does not have to be a sex-ed teacher to understand that stuff -- just have to view an appropriate amount of entertaining clips online.
LOL I think Josie and yourself have an advantage with your unlimited access to the equipment. I think the problem is most guys don't care to ask or figure out what a girl likes and part of that is figuring out where the key points are.
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:20 PM   #194 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by BostonNut View Post
With his motorcycle cop 'stach???

What woman would resist?????
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:23 PM   #195 (permalink)
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you got to look out for those blue ones
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:27 PM   #196 (permalink)
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you got to look out for those blue ones
Myth I say! Actually it's more like I convinced myself it's a myth. That's the only way I can stop the night terrors
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:27 PM   #197 (permalink)
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you got to look out for those blue ones
I thought the blue ones meant that they were still virgins..... Damn.
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:32 PM   #198 (permalink)
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myth i say! Actually it's more like i convinced myself it's a myth. That's the only way i can stop the night terrors
you wherent the one that complained to the mods about the waffle refeRnce in my sig ? Jk but someone did
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Old 08-07-2012, 04:45 PM   #199 (permalink)
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Alright, I think it's time....

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Old 08-07-2012, 04:59 PM   #200 (permalink)
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I think....no...wait.....yep...yep I just had an orgasm from this post.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JosieDively View Post
I can understand why you would be overwhelmed going down on her for the first time. The vagina is very complex in compassion to the penis. We could also come to a lot of conclusions as to why you didn't like it. Smell, grooming issues, etc. Do not mention any of these to her, ever! Maybe you could start things out by suggesting you spice things up by showering together. If you want her to groom, offer to manscape for her. She may feel the need to touch up down below. If all that doesn't work, get a clothes pin, grin and bear it.

First of all, she is your girlfriend now so there is no way you are getting out of going down on her again so you might as well get really good at it and enjoy it. Don't be afraid to get your fingers in on the action but don't be overly aggressive. I have some tips but I am afraid this post is going to get me banned. Lets just say minimal entry and feel for a hidden treasure.

You mentioned she asked you to bite it. She doesn't want you to bite it like you would a french fry she wants you to nibble it, gently. More like, if you try to hold something tiny in between your teeth without breaking it. Imagine holding a cherry stem in between your front bottom and top teeth. If she wants more pressure, she will ask. Change the speed of your licking and gauge the pressure she likes. It will change. Get to know her body movements when she is enjoying herself. Most women have a tell sorta like when men lie during poker. She will squirm, take a deep inhale or exhale or moan. That is when you want to be paying the most attention and repeat as needed.

Also, before you start the next time have the lights on and just admire it. You should always look at your plate before you eat. If she asks what you are doing, say "admiring your beauty."

PS Look a diagram online and get to know the parts. Not knowing the parts is like trying to fix a car when you have never seen an engine.
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