Funny things to do/say when telemarketers call

rip+flip · 01-10-2013, 12:38 PM

Interested to see what some of you have to say lol one I heard recently is give the phone to a young child and tell them its santa

Josh611 · 01-10-2013, 12:50 PM

I don't answer the phone

CaptainBOHICA · 01-10-2013, 12:53 PM

jerk it while they try to pitch you and make it obvious that you are.

they'll never call you again.

37Jetson · 01-10-2013, 12:54 PM

I will turn the table and attempt to sell them something like Amway or Girl Scout Cookies for my daughter. It is quite effective. Try it some time.

jlzinck · 01-10-2013, 12:56 PM

Depends on what they are calling for?

I sometimes put the hadset on speaker phone, listen to the speech and then say "Can you go over it one more time?" something along those lines.

Usually those are to fundraisers who are looking for $$ for something I do not support.

The called once and asked for me and I yelled out "MOOOOOOOOOM..Is dad out f*&%ing his girlfriend?

Ziveus101 · 01-10-2013, 12:59 PM

Racist & sexist jokes and generally pissing the other guy/gal the f**k off is the best.

CaptainBOHICA · 01-10-2013, 12:59 PM

or you can handle it like this guy

Tom Mabe - Telemarketer Prank Call Murder Scene on the Bob and Tom Show (Scipt).avi - YouTube

Cactuspies · 01-10-2013, 01:36 PM

my favorite!!

seinfeld telemarketing.avi - YouTube

retailkid · 01-10-2013, 01:37 PM

Talk to them in spanish, and lots of times they say they are going to transfer me to the spanish call center, right then i say "ok, thanks bro!" And hang up.

DaveTaplin · 01-10-2013, 04:19 PM

I pick up the phone and immediately try to sound like a cow in labor. I figured it would be scary sounding but both kids laugh so I guess it isn't frightening.

archiebunkerjr · 01-10-2013, 04:36 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cVlTeIATBs

GoJays · 01-10-2013, 04:45 PM

My mother in her infinite wisdom would always ramble on with them for 15-20 minutes, or until they hung up.

I personally rip into them, insult them and their families, call them corrupt communist pigs, and hang up the phone. They never call back.

Old Nap · 01-10-2013, 05:19 PM

Here's what I do. Very politely I ask them... "Is it OK if I say no?" or "Do you mind if I say no?" That way it puts it on them.

1. If they say Yes, which they usually do, then I say thanks and hang up.
2. If they say No, I say Really? That's not very nice! and I hang up.

Either way, I hang up without being rude.

teosdesserts · 01-10-2013, 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 37Jetson

I will turn the table and attempt to sell them something like Amway or Girl Scout Cookies for my daughter. It is quite effective. Try it some time.

I do this.

ssbledsoe · 01-10-2013, 05:28 PM

I usually walk into the bathroom, turn on the fan, turn the phone on speaker and proceed to make noises (or actively) to churn out a nice bowl painter. I haven't had anyone last over a minute or 2 for quite awhile. Before I moved into my house I had a guy play along enough that I made a comment about pooping a hemorrhoid with blood everywhere and proceeded to hang up.

XL5 · 01-10-2013, 05:29 PM

I put them on speaker and keep doing whatever I was doing.

xbignick · 01-10-2013, 05:38 PM

I tell them I'm not interested and shut the phone because they have a job to do, and I do not want to waste their time just as I don't want them wasting mine.

migraine · 01-10-2013, 05:58 PM

I tell them to SUCK IT !!!!

metsandweezer · 01-10-2013, 05:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by migraine

I tell them to SUCK IT !!!!

suck what?

migraine · 01-10-2013, 06:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by metsandweezer

suck what?

richard....

Nodie27 · 01-10-2013, 06:08 PM

I stop them and say "I'll take whatever you're selling but I don't have a bank account or credit so you have to personally come pick up the money from me, but it has to be you and you HAVE to come alone."

bigzig · 01-10-2013, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaptainBOHICA

or you can handle it like this guy

Tom Mabe - Telemarketer Prank Call Murder Scene on the Bob and Tom Show (Scipt).avi - YouTube

Tom Mabe is hilarious. I think my favorite of his is the presidential fundraiser.

nabzy28 · 01-10-2013, 08:06 PM

Way back, one called at where I was working. I remember getting a couple of the other guys to just start yelling and I told whoever it was that the damn alligator got out of it's cage and bit one of them on the leg... what should I do? They just hung up.

allabtsprt · 01-10-2013, 08:21 PM

I do one of 3 things, depending on what mood I'm in:

1.) Sometimes I just pick up the phone and lay it down without saying a word and come back in a few minutes and hang it up.

2.) Sometimes I pick the phone up, say "No thanks" before they get a word in and hang up.

3.) Sometimes I quietly listen to their spiel and when they are done I ask them for their home phone number so that I may call and bother them at all hours of the day. Works every time!

Kosmo Kards · 01-10-2013, 10:13 PM

I usually start speaking in tounges and start chanting really loudly. Works every time. On occasion I will use my cookie monster voice and that has worked for me as well.

01-10-2013, 12:38 PM	#1 (permalink)
rip+flip Member Join Date: May 2012 Posts: 870	Funny things to do/say when telemarketers call Interested to see what some of you have to say lol one I heard recently is give the phone to a young child and tell them its santa

01-10-2013, 12:50 PM	#2 (permalink)
Josh611 Member Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Michigan Posts: 5,679	I don't answer the phone __________________ Collecting University of Michigan Football Alumni Autos

01-10-2013, 12:54 PM	#4 (permalink)
37Jetson Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: South Central PA Posts: 7,523 Tigers1984WS	I will turn the table and attempt to sell them something like Amway or Girl Scout Cookies for my daughter. It is quite effective. Try it some time. __________________ Greed makes weak people do some incredibly weak things - Andrewjones

01-10-2013, 12:56 PM	#5 (permalink)
jlzinck Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Cape Cod, MA Posts: 11,709 jlzinck	Depends on what they are calling for? I sometimes put the hadset on speaker phone, listen to the speech and then say "Can you go over it one more time?" something along those lines. Usually those are to fundraisers who are looking for $$ for something I do not support. The called once and asked for me and I yelled out "MOOOOOOOOOM..Is dad out f&%ing his girlfriend? __________________ http://vaughnlive.tv/jlzinck http://www.ustream.tv/channel/jon-s-box-breaks-and-more Last edited by iluvfish2; 01-10-2013 at 09:12 PM. Reason: see private thread*

01-10-2013, 12:59 PM	#6 (permalink)
Ziveus101 Member Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: The Empire State Posts: 811	Racist & sexist jokes and generally pissing the other guy/gal the fk off is the best. __________________ PC's: Dellin Betances and Francisco Cervelli Pandemonium Doesn't Reign Around Here, It Pours** Last edited by Ziveus101; 01-10-2013 at 01:02 PM.

01-10-2013, 12:53 PM	#3 (permalink)
CaptainBOHICA Banned Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Sacramento Posts: 9,888 captainbohica	jerk it while they try to pitch you and make it obvious that you are. they'll never call you again.

01-10-2013, 12:59 PM	#7 (permalink)
CaptainBOHICA Banned Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Sacramento Posts: 9,888 captainbohica	or you can handle it like this guy Tom Mabe - Telemarketer Prank Call Murder Scene on the Bob and Tom Show (Scipt).avi - YouTube

01-10-2013, 01:36 PM	#8 (permalink)
Cactuspies Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: A Sand Castle in the Arizona Desert Posts: 4,560 azpatssox09 azsoxpatriots	my favorite!! seinfeld telemarketing.avi - YouTube __________________ #Teamconnor #BostonStrong Doubront/Pierre Thomas/Nate Thurmond Thread/Post Grading is back!!! http://www.comc.com/Users/azsoxpatriots -->20% auto accept everyday! http://www.sportlots.com/inven/invenbin/dealerpage.tpl?dealer=AzPats10 RIP Mom 10/8/09, PAPAJIM 11/22/10, Madbacker 4/3/13 & CBO (banned not passed)

01-10-2013, 01:37 PM	#9 (permalink)
retailkid Member Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Toledo, Ohio Posts: 327	Talk to them in spanish, and lots of times they say they are going to transfer me to the spanish call center, right then i say "ok, thanks bro!" And hang up. __________________ I send in plain white envelope safely!!! Currently looking for a Kobe Bryant Auto, let me know if you have one! Sometimes I randomly PM people

01-10-2013, 04:19 PM	#10 (permalink)
DaveTaplin Member Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: West Gardiner, Me Posts: 1,039 blanktowels Meowingthings	I pick up the phone and immediately try to sound like a cow in labor. I figured it would be scary sounding but both kids laugh so I guess it isn't frightening.

01-10-2013, 04:36 PM	#11 (permalink)
archiebunkerjr Member Join Date: Jan 2012 Posts: 257	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cVlTeIATBs __________________ My Bucket Updated on 2012.01.23 - http://s176.photobucket.com/albums/w179/archiebunkerjr/

01-10-2013, 04:45 PM	#12 (permalink)
GoJays Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada Posts: 4,784	My mother in her infinite wisdom would always ramble on with them for 15-20 minutes, or until they hung up. I personally rip into them, insult them and their families, call them corrupt communist pigs, and hang up the phone. They never call back. __________________ NHL Officiating: helping out superstars and their teams any way they can since 1993.

01-10-2013, 05:19 PM	#13 (permalink)
Old Nap Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Seattle Posts: 754 HeShootsHeScores	Here's what I do. Very politely I ask them... "Is it OK if I say no?" or "Do you mind if I say no?" That way it puts it on them. 1. If they say Yes, which they usually do, then I say thanks and hang up. 2. If they say No, I say Really? That's not very nice! and I hang up. Either way, I hang up without being rude. __________________ I collect: Nap Lajoie \| Anaheim Ducks Working on: 2010-11 Certified Champions Ducks (Getzlaf, Perry, Selanne) Rainbow. 12/28

01-10-2013, 05:28 PM	#15 (permalink)
ssbledsoe Member Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Indiana Posts: 2,322 ssbledsoe	I usually walk into the bathroom, turn on the fan, turn the phone on speaker and proceed to make noises (or actively) to churn out a nice bowl painter. I haven't had anyone last over a minute or 2 for quite awhile. Before I moved into my house I had a guy play along enough that I made a comment about pooping a hemorrhoid with blood everywhere and proceeded to hang up. __________________ Current Needs: Drew Bledsoe 2009 BTL Auto's O,T,S; Buybacks; Butler Bulldogs (Gordon Hayward, Shelvin Mack, Matt Howard); Looking for the following: Alfonzo Dennard '12 TC Superfractor; Chandler Jones '12 TC and Bowman Sterling Superfractors; Please PM me with details

01-10-2013, 05:29 PM	#16 (permalink)
XL5 Member Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Chicago Posts: 3,789 xl5	I put them on speaker and keep doing whatever I was doing. __________________ Want: 2010 Allen & Ginter N43 relics of Pujols, Markakis, Howard. Want: Konerko high-end, looking for Konerko 2012 Topps S1 #/1 and Mini Platinum (silver) #/5 My buckets: https://sites.google.com/site/xl5inventory/ My shipping: DC and mailed next business day. My LCSs: Elite Sports Cards, Chicago; Tim's Baseball Card Shop, Chicago

01-10-2013, 05:38 PM	#17 (permalink)
xbignick Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: New Jersey Posts: 5,525 xxBigNick God Bless!	I tell them I'm not interested and shut the phone because they have a job to do, and I do not want to waste their time just as I don't want them wasting mine. __________________ Check out my eBay (xxbignick)! Listing a bunch of stuff so feel free to offer me a price on here! Currently Buying: 2010 Michael Choice Chrome Autographs Spots in Houdini's 1st GoT Break: 7, 38, 55. For sale, feel free to send offers, also in second and third GoT breaks.

01-10-2013, 05:58 PM	#18 (permalink)
migraine Inactive Account Join Date: May 2009 Location: RIGHT BEHIND YOU ! Posts: 2,164	I tell them to SUCK IT !!!!

01-10-2013, 06:08 PM	#21 (permalink)
Nodie27 Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Bell Gardens, CA Posts: 4,954 jmscards2009	I stop them and say "I'll take whatever you're selling but I don't have a bank account or credit so you have to personally come pick up the money from me, but it has to be you and you HAVE to come alone." __________________ #Team Connor

01-10-2013, 08:06 PM	#23 (permalink)
nabzy28 Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 1,111 nabzy28	Way back, one called at where I was working. I remember getting a couple of the other guys to just start yelling and I told whoever it was that the damn alligator got out of it's cage and bit one of them on the leg... what should I do? They just hung up. __________________ Stop buying Panini products. Just stop. If you post another thread complaining about how bad your box of Panini 'whatthehellever' was, just bash your face into a 2x4 with rusty nails sticking out. Buying their products is about just as smart.

01-10-2013, 08:21 PM	#24 (permalink)
allabtsprt Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 47	I do one of 3 things, depending on what mood I'm in: 1.) Sometimes I just pick up the phone and lay it down without saying a word and come back in a few minutes and hang it up. 2.) Sometimes I pick the phone up, say "No thanks" before they get a word in and hang up. 3.) Sometimes I quietly listen to their spiel and when they are done I ask them for their home phone number so that I may call and bother them at all hours of the day. Works every time!

01-10-2013, 10:13 PM	#25 (permalink)
Kosmo Kards Member Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: Passed out in the Circus Liquor parking lot!!!! Posts: 1,754 kardcollector87	I usually start speaking in tounges and start chanting really loudly. Works every time. On occasion I will use my cookie monster voice and that has worked for me as well. Last edited by Kosmo Kards; 01-10-2013 at 10:19 PM.

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