I can't believe this conversation actually happened:

[ageofreason13]

So our company launched its new website last Friday. On the section of the site that requires a username and password we posted a user guide to help our clients better understand how to use the site. My boss was angry to find the user guide missing a few things she thought were critical. The following is the argument that ensued:

Boss: "I think the first part of the user guide should tell the clients how to open up Explorer or whatever and then what web address to type and where to type it..."

Me: "I don't think we should go that far"

Boss: "Well, don't you think our clients need to know how to get on our site and then login?"

Me: "of course, but hopefully they can do all of that already,"

Boss: "but what about the ones who can't? Why shouldn't we put these steps in the user guide on the website?"

Me: (thinking: beyond it being one of the dumbest ideas ever...) "Clients have to login to the site to view the user guide, they would not need the first pages because obviously they logged on to the site."

Boss: (Angry blank stare) and finally she says "Well I think it is important..."

No matter how bad this week gets, just remember, at least you didn't have this conversation Monday morning...

And guess who is adding new pages to the user guide...

[Cactuspies]

I just nearly spit my food on my desk. That is a good one.

I've had to show someone at my night job how to use the sum function in excel 15 times now for adding 2 numbers together. She still uses a calculator instead.

[ageofreason13]

Originally Posted by Cactuspies

I just nearly spit my food on my desk. That is a good one.

I've had to show someone at my night job how to use the sum function in excel 15 times now for adding 2 numbers together. She still uses a calculator instead.

How do these people even get hired? Our new hire hasn't been able to work for the last few days because her computer was "messed up"

Now that the website is live I had time to finally help her this morning. Turns out she was trying to open PDF files through word perfect and there was nothing wrong with her computer...

But the temp just discovered un-bittered duster in the supply closet

[calculusdork]

Originally Posted by ageofreason13

How do these people even get hired? Our new hire hasn't been able to work for the last few days because her computer was "messed up"

Now that the website is live I had time to finally help her this morning. Turns out she was trying to open PDF files through word perfect and there was nothing wrong with her computer...

But the temp just discovered un-bittered duster in the supply closet

What is this, 1995?

I know exactly what you are talking about man. I dealt with the exact same thing in a previous job (writing procedures and having some of the required reviewers ask "Don't you think you should have the person check to make sure his/her computer is on first?"). It's not fun, but push through it with humility.

[fullmetal]

What if your customer doesn't know how to turn the computer on?

I think your guide should go further back.

Make sure to only provide it digitally.

[calculusdork]

Originally Posted by fullmetal

What if your customer doesn't know how to turn the computer on?

I think your guide should go further back.

Make sure to only provide it digitally.

LOL ... see how long it takes the boss to catch on

[ManInTheMirror]

Originally Posted by fullmetal

What if your customer doesn't know how to turn the computer on?

I think your guide should go further back.

Make sure to only provide it digitally.

Not only that- they probably need assistance purchasing a computer. They probably don't even know what a computer is. Step-by-step all the way!

[ageofreason13]

My next draft of the guide will start with:

"breath in, breath out, repeat"

[ageofreason13]

Originally Posted by fullmetal

What if your customer doesn't know how to turn the computer on?

I think your guide should go further back.

Make sure to only provide it digitally.

You joke, but I am also certain this issue crossed her mind at least once.

[oldgoldy97]

It's like when you are on a conference call and the leader asks "can anyone not hear me?". HTF are you supposed to answer that question if you can't hear it in the first place??????

[mnvikingstwins]

Originally Posted by fullmetal

What if your customer doesn't know how to turn the computer on?

I think your guide should go further back.

Make sure to only provide it digitally.

It might take so long to go through the guide that the customer becomes hungry, so you might want to throw an intermission with instructions for making a PB&J in somewhere in the middle.

[blake03svtf]

Can someone help me post in this thread?

[Cactuspies]

Originally Posted by Cactuspies

I just nearly spit my food on my desk. That is a good one.

I've had to show someone at my night job how to use the sum function in excel 15 times now for adding 2 numbers together. She still uses a calculator instead.

Originally Posted by ageofreason13

How do these people even get hired? Our new hire hasn't been able to work for the last few days because her computer was "messed up"
Now that the website is live I had time to finally help her this morning. Turns out she was trying to open PDF files through word perfect and there was nothing wrong with her computer...

But the temp just discovered un-bittered duster in the supply closet

Lets just say I have had to make a step by step guide w/screen prints on how to do things at both of my jobs and there are a few people I have sat with to train and have never been more scared of them:

A. being on a computer,
B. having access to items which can be moved around into different folders or drives,
C. training them on what I have been doing daily for 5 or 6 years and watching them mess it up like nothing I have ever seen before.

we have one guy on my team (I have posted about him before) He is imac jr/davepeters jr/jonmead jr - he is never wrong, but everyone else is. Everytime we have to fix something his name is attached to it. I'm amazed that I NEVER see anyone else's name out of the 8 of us on the team. We have had a newer person on the team since around the middle of December and she already knows and does more that this other guy can do, and she doesn't make any mistakes.

[ageofreason13]

The really frustrating issue here is that our clients really don't need the user guide. It is the boss and the rest of the staff that need the user guide. I am sure there are clients who may need some help, but most of them had a lot of input in the development of the site. They know how it works because the functions are what they wanted...

[Nodie27]

Originally Posted by ageofreason13

The really frustrating issue here is that our clients really don't need the user guide. It is the boss and the rest of the staff that need the user guide. I am sure there are clients who may need some help, but most of them had a lot of input in the development of the site. They know how it works because the functions are what they wanted...

We have the same issue at work. Each department has to write procedures for their work. The boss is yet to approve any of them because she thinks we need to elaborate.

Small Example

verify that all information on the drivers license matches with what we have on file

Boss: I think we need to state what information needs to be verified such as the address, dob, ID number and expiration date.

[ToppsCollector1]

and this was the boss you say? How does that happen?

[ageofreason13]

Originally Posted by ToppsCollector1

and this was the boss you say? How does that happen?

She bought out the business when the founding partner died...


Nodie27, do we work together?

[mindbinge]

should have asked how they turned the computer on in the first place without her help.

i've had these conversations and usually they don't end well for me lol.

[golferphil]

Originally Posted by oldgoldy97

It's like when you are on a conference call and the leader asks "can anyone not hear me?". HTF are you supposed to answer that question if you can't hear it in the first place??????

Not to derail the stupid people discussion, but oldgoldy, who is your avatar? She looks delightful!

[ageofreason13]

Originally Posted by mindbinge

should have asked how they turned the computer on in the first place without her help.

i've had these conversations and usually they don't end well for me lol.

On the bright side, I am the only person in our office that can manage the content on the site. So I get away with being a bit more snarky than I should. If the job market in our area wasn't total crap I'd do something and pretty much dare her to fire me. Most people in our industry know her reputation and would see it as a big issue if they had a need for someone with my skill set.

[mindbinge]

Originally Posted by ageofreason13

On the bright side, I am the only person in our office that can manage the content on the site. So I get away with being a bit more snarky than I should. If the job market in our area wasn't total crap I'd do something and pretty much dare her to fire me. Most people in our industry know her reputation and would see it as a big issue if they had a need for someone with my skill set.

well you can always go the other direction with it and write it up as being from the time they wake up, get dressed, eat breakfast, and all that up to the point of opening the browser...lol. If you're going to beat a dead horse, might as well beat it good!

[My-Coolectibles]

My brother used to work at tech support in the mid 90's. He would tell me all the stories about people calling in with stupid questions.

1) "My coffee cup holder broke."
They were using the CD tray as a coffee cup holder.

2) "When I insert my ATM card, nothing happens."
They were inserting an ATM card into the floppy disk drive.

3) "When I step on the foot pedal, my computer goes crazy."
They were stepping on the mouse.

[ageofreason13]

Originally Posted by My-Coolectibles

My brother used to work at tech support in the mid 90's. He would tell me all the stories about people calling in with stupid questions.

1) "My coffee cup holder broke."
They were using the CD tray as a coffee cup holder.

2) "When I insert my ATM card, nothing happens."
They were inserting an ATM card into the floppy disk drive.

3) "When I step on the foot pedal, my computer goes crazy."
They were stepping on the mouse.

Sadly I have seen 1.) in person recently, but I think they knew that it also had another purpose.